i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Randomize
