i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
