I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I enjoy the company of your penis
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize