O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Randomize