we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
