Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
