so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
