that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
