the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
