Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize
