It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize
