so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
