Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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