I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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