Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
