i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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