you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Drunk is not a location!
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize