The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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