the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
