Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
