She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize
