May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
