3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Randomize
