I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
is wine microwaveable?
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
