Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
