so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
