It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
