biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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