The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
