love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
Randomize
