I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
