How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
