Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
