Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
