Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
