I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
