There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize