problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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