I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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