im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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