I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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