Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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