He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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