Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
