shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize