Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
