i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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