Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
