what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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