For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
try to milk me bitch
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